Me, WE

Looking back, my development during adolescence was a lot like wandering through the aisles of a grocery store: a process of sampling, taste-testing, and comparison shopping.

This sampling was a by-product of the encouragement I received from my parents to do whatever I wanted. Whatever made me happy. I'm not so sure as I leave adolescence, that carte blanche was such a good thing.

For me, the transition into adolescence was much easier than the transition into adulthood. My interests were too broad in high school and college, and I graduated with a degree and great love for English, but no idea what I wanted to do for a living.

Did I want to teach? My parents and only sibling are all teachers. I rebelled because, as an adolescent, I wasn't interested in dealing with adolescents. For a living, I fell into sales, and ultimately real estate. I've learned a lot about the world, but I just can't see myself doing it forever. Because, to go back to my parents mantra, it doesn't make me happy.

My life outside work, the things which do make me happy, have evolved in steps. My interests are still important and I actively pursue the joys of Softball, Running, Reading, Writing, Painting, Photography, Religion, Following Sports and arguing Politics.

... Not to mention those defining "real" Life events that have become my "context" ... getting married, buying a home, losing loved ones, and having a son.

I am inclined to believe adolescence didn't end for me until I experienced those four 'life changing' events. There is nothing like true responsibility, love, and loss, to narrow one's focus. In fact, a large portion of my peer group has nonesuch responsibility and there is much proof that they are still (despite being 27-29 years old) living out their adolescence. I love them nonetheless. At the same time, I'm confident that this trend of "extended adolescence" can be seen throughout the country, and is probably a by-product of the overall ease of life in America.

I've always been curious and like to observe from the fringe. That said, diving in and doing things myself, living through things, experiencing things first-hand, has always been my best teacher-- both during adolescence and today. Only when I was allowed to fully consume (and consume myself in) events, books, assignments, etc., was I able to digest things, make them mine, and truly have a defining experience.

In this way, through the compilation of life events, books, experiences, etc, my adolescence contributed to who I am today.

Storm and Stress is a relative thing. I may have thought things were stormy or stressful, but looking back they seem laughable. Surely this is part of the growth process.

Perhaps like a distance runner builds engurance, you gain the strength to endure big storms by first weathering small storms (albeit that might seem big at the time). And isn't that further example of adolescent sampling?

That said, its important for educators, having endured through their years a bit more storm and stress, to remember that everything is relative.

The butterflies before the big game and girl-trouble pangs wracked me with very real pain. And as funny as that seems now, I will be a better teacher if I remember what I went through as an adolescent.

Ultimately, my process of self-growth has brought me to this point in my history. Only by going through my exact set of life experiences --good and bad, successes and failures-- have I become who I am. I am grateful for these experiences, because they culminate in the ability to now, instead of gathering experiences exclusively for myself, provide a way for the next generation to gather their own set of defining experiences. It is my hope that I can be an good, strong influence on the lives of many kids. And share a few of my interests along the way.